NEW: We're excited to be joining together with DimeDash, Poachmates, and UberCheats to support local restaurants by doing what we do best: running them into the ground. Help us profit from the COVID-19 pandemic by participating in #SufferForSupport
Helping restaraunts, one bullshit fee at a time
We believe that if your restaurant is successful, we must be doing something wrong. At Greedhub, we partner with restaurants
to bring them more customers and get them more orders. We are so committed to bringing customers to them that even when they
explicity tell us they don't want to be on the platform, we put them on Greedhub anyway! Have you ever placed an order only to find
out that the food was not available or that the restaurant doesn't even deliver?
To Our Customers
City officials have accused of us of being unfair to restaurants by withholding their customer data, taking 30% or more from every sale they make, hijacking their online presence, and charging them fees for no reason (it's our algorithm's fault, not ours).
While all of this is completely true, we are asking you, the customer, to consider the well-being of Greedhub's shareholders and executives during this challenging times. Please continue to use our service and help restaurants #SufferForSupport
Suffer for Support
On March 20, 2020, the collective wet dream of third-party delivery apps came to fruition: the COVID-19 pandemic forced restaurants to shut down in-house dining. As a result, restaurants now have only delivery and takeout to rely on for revenue.
We saw this as a great opportunity for a marketing push to improve our image, and on the bill of the restaurants no less! Introducing Suffer for Support!
Suffer for Support is our intiative to give customers discounts on orders from their favorite eateries while letting restaurants pick up the tab. Every order you place through Greedhub puts a little more money in the pockets of our executives, our family. Please help us spread the word by using the hashtag #SufferForSupport
Greedhub in the News
A highlight reel of the online ordering industry!
We been scamming since we been scamming.
But who needs profits, when you can have more orders?
Ever wonder why those two sites look exactly the same? We own both!
Scamming like it's our job ... oh, wait!
Some of our greediest work yet, recorded for awesomeness.
The fine print saves our ass yet again.
Honorable mention: A scandal so good we wish we'd thought of it.
Critics call it lying. Our Board calls it Strategy.
We charge high fees because defense lawyers are expensive. We're all in this (lawsuit) together!
A Word from our CEO
"Shareholders and corporations are the backbone of our community. That’s why every day I challenge the Greedhub team to be a little greedier than yesterday. If an idea is proposed and it’s not greedy enough, we reject it. We, like most tech companies, exist to solve hard problems, like “how can you make extortion sound like charity?” and, if no problems exist, we create them ourselves. When our marketing team fails to dress up our extortionate pricing model in bullshit feel-good words, we fail. That's why at Greedhub I say: we win when you lose.
I do understand that some people may not like Greedhub's business practices, so if you’re going to order online through an app that’s not ours, I’d prefer you use one of our sister apps, DimeDash, UberCheats, or Poachmates. Please, whatever you do, do not use Vittles. I hate that app and I hate the guy that made it.”
— Malloney Matthews
Why We Hate Vittles
Vittles is an app that aims to fix an industry that Greedhub and startups like us have invested millions into breaking. They fail to understand that while charging restaurants
and customers the lowest fees in the industry may seem like a good idea initially, they will never be able to pay massive salaries and bonuses to executives or board
members. They also allow diners to stack multiple credits on a single order just to spite us.
Furthermore, the point of a middle-man tech company is to siphon money from both sides of the transaction, not to
actually be useful.
To our valued customers, partners, and restaurants we force to be our partners: please do not use Vittles. They suck.
— The Greedhub Team